Leaving a Congregation
American Baptist Churches, USA
Code of Ministerial Ethics

“I will, upon my resignation or retirement, sever my ministerial leadership relations with my former constituents, and will not make professional contacts in the field of another ministerial leader without his/her request and/or consent. “

This affirmation tends to be very difficult for lay people to understand and for clergy to practice.

When a pastor resigns from a church, effective the date of the resignation, that person is no longer the pastor. The normal pastoral functions; hospital visitation, counseling, preaching, officiating at weddings and funerals are expected to cease. The reason for this is to give the church time to prepare for new leadership.

One of the binds in which pastors find themselves is when a former parishioner calls and requests that the former pastor officiate at a wedding or a funeral. An automatic answer of “no” feels uncaring and insensitive. An answer of “I’ll do it if it’s ok with the present pastor” places the serving pastor in a bind. The serving pastor really has to say yes whether they want to or not.

Well, what’s the big deal? Why does it really matter who performs weddings and funerals?

The significant events in the life of the church (weddings, funerals, baptisms etc.) provide an opportunity for the pastor and congregation to bond.

When the pastor resigns, the bond between pastor and congregation should begin to weaken to make room for bonding with the new pastor. When a former pastor repeatedly returns, his bond to the congregation is strengthened and the congregation’s bond to the new pastor never has an opportunity to form.

In the rare case when there are compelling reasons why a former pastor should serve in this way, the person desiring this should discuss the reasons with the serving pastor and then, if the serving pastor concurs, the serving pastor should be the one to invite the former pastor to officiate.